• Depression,  OCD,  Suicidal Thoughts,  Writing

    Harder To Write, Or Do Anything

    I’m not breaking down sobbing, or stuck in bed 24/7… But I’m still in this same, lingering mindset of hopelessness and misery. I made the effort of spending time with my best friend yesterday (Thursday) and today (Friday) – but… I don’t know. It’s like embracing a different kind of distraction. It’s enjoyable in the moment, but in the grander scheme has changed nothing. I’d been making steady progress on a few writing projects recently… Less so blogging actively here than I should be, but still. Two short stories, each approaching 10,000 words at the moment – one right at that number, the other with more of a gap to…

  • Depression,  OCD,  Suicidal Thoughts

    Planning vs Ideation

    Apologies, first of all, for falling quiet over the last week or so. Not that anyone is particularly following this, but I’m trying to keep up with actively posting. There are just times I disconnect and collapse into myself… And that kind of happened. While those periods of isolated, musing melancholy can be burdensome – they can also (at times) stimulate thought. And I’ve been thinking about suicide…for better or worse. To start with, let’s cover some basic definitions. Suicidal ideation refers to thoughts of/about suicide. While this could include intent or plans of action, ‘ideation’ is used to indicate the presence of recurrent thoughts as a symptom/manifestation unto itself.…